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Sunday, July 5, 2015

***7 Things You Should Never Say to a Woman When You Date Her*** (@Penney_Peroud)


7 Things You Should Never Say to a Woman When You Date Her by @Penney_Peroud on Twitter

7. “You remind me of my grand mom ________.”
               My reply if I ever heard this: Okay? Would you like a glass of milk and cookies with that b.s.?
6. “That color is nice, but I prefer _________.”
               My reply if I ever heard this: well then, you need to make an appointment for me to get it our favorite color.
5. “Why don’t you ever get your nails done baby?”
Note: To anyone dating a woman, NEVER SAY THIS UNLESS YOU HAVE YOUR CASH, DEBIT/CREDIT CARD in hand and plan on getting them done for her right after.
               My reply if I ever heard this: (see note).
4. “Your jeans aren’t tight enough.”
               My reply if I heard this being as though I usually always wear tight jeans, lol: The key is for me to not have to visit Walgreen’s or Duane Reade for YI cream.
3.  “Bae—did you gain some weight? You seem a bit on the fat side.”
               My reply if I heard this: Duck. (Just kidding, lol). No seriously duck because any respectable woman won’t hit you, and I hope you won’t hit her either, but her male cousin or brother just might.
2. “Bae, she’s cute right? (points to another woman in real life or on t.v.)
               My advice to you: Be quiet. Go read a book or something.
1. “You ai-ight.” DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES EVER TELL A WOMAN THAT HERSELF, HOW SHE LOOKS, HER COOKING SKILLS, OR ANYTHING SHE DOES IS “AI-IGHT.*” (*slang term for alright or okay).

               My advice to you: Run.

--Penn @Penney_Peroud on Twitter; That Juicy Tea on Facebook

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by Penn Peroud